Thursday, July 24, 2008

Power of Positive Thinking

I’ve been in dark mood, lately and wearing a lot of black…not just because I like Johnny Cash’s style, but because I’ve been stressed out and overworked.

It’s not just because I have four different jobs right now, but because my main bread-and-butter job has piled on the workload in a big, bad and ugly way. I’m doing the job of two people and trying to smile.

Or maybe its just because I'm reading a Samuel Beckett biography...He's not exactly a cheery guy...

Then there is the other nagging feeling that theater in this country and theater in this town seems irrelevant. I’ve been wondering what the point of theater is…what the point of writing plays is…Every time I see a play or work on my own play, I ask, “what is the point?” and “does this make a difference?”

This, of course, may seem defeatist, but again, it’s not. It’s just asking more of what the theatre can do.

I truly believe theatre can change lives. Theatre (and storytelling) exists as an outlet for our fears, desires, loves. Theater is the way the community breathes with each other, shares heritage, and communicates in other ways besides spreadsheets and PowerPoint presentations.

This is why there is a picture of Jeffrey from the show Slings & Arrows. Sometimes I feel (and look) just like that...

Except I didn't have a nervous breakdown while playing Hamlet and I don't talk to ghosts...yet...

I was talking to my wife last night about meditation. Actually, she was talking to me about how those who meditate on positive things will live longer and be happier. Studies have shown this, evidently. So this morning while walking the dog, I stopped, closed my eyes and gave it a little try. I’m not sure if I did it right…It’s been a long time since I meditated…But I think it worked.

For instance, while driving to work I didn’t seem as bothered by the cars going under the speed limit. I didn’t panic over the amount of work I had waiting for me at the office.

I seemed relaxed.

It's an unusual albeit, welcome feeling. Now, let’s see if I can sustain it throughout the day.

Perhaps I should watch that “Last Lecture” again?

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